It is specifically meant for those who are contemplating visiting a recently bereaved family. Generally, one can expect to listen to mantras being chanted around the deceaseds body at a house funeral. During the weeks and months of loneliness that follow, especially after the crowds disperse, the bereaved person might feel that the world is avoiding them. If unsure, the best thing to do is stick to something straightforward. Your sister was a beautiful person. Most of the Hindu mourning rituals performed are designed to promote the free expression of emotions. Good behaviours while visiting the bereaved. Hare Krishna. If you are a close friend or relative: Call or text immediately, find a time to visit the bereaved at home, and continue to stay in touch on a daily basis. So, they can view the body when they enter the house and offers some brief words of condolence to the bereaved family. You could certainly send her a personal note expressing your condolences. This may include feelings of shock, sadness, and even guilt. . There, husbands and wives increasingly share household roles as dual-earners. The body of the deceased should be released as quickly as possible to enable the family to prepare for the funeral. When one is in the cycle of rebirth, you would ask God to give momentum to the soul because the Hindu journey is ultimately to reach God. (n.d.). If you decide you want to do it, then write your talk from your heart. Not reading or reciting anything from the holy scriptures. Responding to a Clients Note of Appreciation, Addressing a Former President of the United States, Complete Guide to Writing Thank You Notes, Attire Guide: Dress Codes from Casual to White Tie, Five Tips for Looking Crisp and Keeping Cool in the Workplace, How to Help When Someone is in the Hospital, Definition of Etiquette - Consideration, Respect and Honesty, Wedding Etiquette 101: Everything You Need to Know. If its not possible to visit there, then make a phone call. Hindu death rituals involve chanting of certain mantras, which are written especially to be chanted at funerals. During the ceremony, the last food is offered and flowers are arranged around the body. It is a common slip-up for people to assume that sharing their own religious beliefs would bring solace to the bereaved family. If you are a friend of a friend: Send an email or handwritten note at your convenience. It is better to dress conservatively. Leaving footwear outside is part of local culture in India, and is a respectful gesture in this context. Now you can focus on leaving a legacy instead of a mess. For many people it can be a great comfort to know that friends are thinking of them in such a difficult time. It's best to stick with their request at such a sensitive time. 8. When someone has lived a happy, full life, there may be increased celebrations and dancing. Honorary pallbearers are chosen from among the deceased's closest friends and/or business associates. Alternatively, consider upgrading your account to enjoy an ad-free experience along with numerous other benefits. In all branches of Hinduism, family plays a key role in helping their loved one prepare for their death and rebirth. Someones positive familial and community impact is enough of a statement to their character in and of itself. 14. Those who are emotionally close to the bereaved person may quietly ask How are you and give them a chance to express their feelings. 4. Flowers play a significant role in Hindu funerals but are used much differently from those in Western funerals. For some, it can be a sense of awkwardnessa fear of saying or doing something inappropriate, or an aversion to seeing grief-stricken people. Although attitudes and risk tolerances vary, no sane parent would knowingly do anything that would harm their child. 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Funeral Mass (Requiem) is performed in a Catholic church by a priest. People should wear white and not black. A thoughtful gift which allows the name of the deceased to be mentioned will provide long-lasting comfort to the family. One must specifically avoid words that trivialise the event, some hilarious examples being: I cant believe he is deadhe looks like he might just get up any minute! Hindu funeral rituals decree that cremation is the custom, but the deceased body remains in the home of the family until you move it to the cremation place. Silence is a good option; a kind gesture can speak better than words. If the bereaved person would rather speak to someone they dont know or needs additional support, specialist bereavement support services (see below) are available. Plan a remembering celebration with family or friends. At that time, one can bright gifts like fruit. It would surely be a meaningful and caring gesture. We pray that Lord Krishna gives you great strength to travel through all of this suffering. Your mother had a happy death. 24/7 +65 9135 4444 Dismiss. Usually, Hindu funerals take place within a single day and sometimes, two days after the deaths time. A common blunder by well-meaning visitors is to try and compare with their own limited experiences. The family should be consulted about any jewellery and religious symbols that need to be left in place. Do not grieve for his body, for his soul is eternal. With this in mind, here are a few ideas for what to write in a. (2020). It is appropriate to visit the home of the family as anexpression of comfort and support. Blaming the family for not choosing another hospital or doctor is a common and futile exercise that occurs at bereaved homes. Good Thinking provides a range of resources to help Londoners improve their mental wellbeing. During the thirteen-day period of mourning following the death, the presence of friends and family helps create positive karma to help prepare the soul for its next incarnation. If not familiar with the situation, it is helpful to call a friend who knows the family, to find out beforehand when and where to visit, and what the right thing to do is while visiting. The Spirit is not destroyed when the body is destroyed. 13. Usage of any form or other service on our website is
Guests may attend the cremation, but if they do not want to, they may depart after the service. Determining the best time to contact the bereaved generally depends on your relationship to the bereaved or the person who died. Visitors are expected to bring fruit. Instagram. What kind of gift is appropriate for an occasion? The last thing the family wants at such a difficult time is advice. Recalling a good deed that the person did, but the family was perhaps unaware of, can be particularly heart-warming. Any distractions must be shrugged away until we are out of sight, and away from earshot. Whether we are comfortable with it or not, visiting bereaved families is part of living in society. After the shraddha ceremony, the family usually returns to work after 1-3 weeks. After someone dies, their body should be treated with respect. Twitter. There are no set customs prohibiting working during the period of mourning, so returning to work is often an individual decision. eCondolence.com, LLC | Copyright 2023. For many people who have experienced a death, it can be helpful to know that their closest friends and family are thinking of them and are available to help. In either case, develop a list of questions that your friend will need to answer. Thats why cremation is preferred. If we are not familiar with the deceaseds family, it is better to introduce ourselves and verify the identity of key family members before proceeding to offer condolences. There is a gathering of family and friends who are grieving. Various worldwide locations connote different customs and norms. It is customary to make a brief visit and spend a few moments in private prayer and then to visit with the family members. Recognizing and honoring this belief means that you grasp the idea of Brahman or the universal soul. However, they include prayers, rice balls and flowers are arranged around the body, a lamp is kept near the bodys head, food is offered, and water is sprinkled over the body. A mourner may return to a normal work and social schedule after this ceremony. As such, this message will work for the friend who sincerely believed in the transitory nature of the body itself. After that, the body is moved to the cremation place from the home, where the cremation ceremony takes place. The mourning period is observed at the grieving family's home and will last from 10 to 30 days. Explain that you don't feel you can do it, and be honest as to why. The bereaved family usually stays home from work for one week following a death. Time spent at the funeral home may vary. Any information you provide to Cake, and all communications between you and Cake,
And if you plan on visiting themyoull spend more time in silence rather than offering condolences. The family also . Choosing an appropriate date to bring home newborn. Such tasks can include arranging for the ambulance, delivering food, cleaning the house, doing the shopping, taking care of paperwork, keeping smaller children occupied and assisting with funeral arrangements. Perhaps your friends child died as a teenager and didnt have a chance to go to university or get married for many reasons. Take a look. Will it be a private or open service? If this cultural shift is your cousins history, it might be appropriate to mention that distinction to honor them both after. Here, reading 2.20 has been explained. Hare Krishna. Drop her a note periodically, or even an e-mail, to let her know you're thinking of her. It is also key to building positive karma for the deceased. https://www.learnreligions.com/healing-words-for-tragic-times-1770148. If this cultural shift is your cousins history, it might be appropriate to mention that distinction to honor them both after offering condolences. I understand that cerain days like Fridays and Saturdays are avoided for such visits. Visitors are also welcome during this period. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register. Visitations are usually held one or two days prior to the funeral service during a fixed set of hours. Unlike some religions, youll also find that Hindus mourn for 13 days, which can also determine what you should and should not write. There will be things to be done at the home, such as taking care of guests or handling phone calls. For advice on choosing the best form of communication to use, see our article: How to Offer Condolences, For tips on what to say and not say to someone who has experienced a loss, see our article: How to Express Sympathy: What to Say and What Not to Say, Paying Final Bills, Dues, And Estate Expenses. I remember my neighbour had a much more terrible time with the same disease. If a family member has persistent trouble sleeping, help must be summoned. I am sorry for your loss. Certain rituals occur in the final moments, including: What should health and care professionals bear in mind? It would be helpful if someone clarifies regarding the appropriate days to visit the members of bereaved family. It's appropriate to visit the family at their home after their period of mourning, which typically lasts 10 days. Sometimes, guests also attend this ceremony. Medicine is not an exact science, and the human body is not a machine that has replaceable parts or even an instruction manual. That said, if you are thinking about contacting the bereaved or would like to offer your condolences, you should absolutely do so. It is worth knowing that they are not always expecting a reply from uswe just need to listen. They sit in the first two rows on the left, and after the service they leave, two by two, preceding the casket. Unfortunately, when a son dies, some people come up with public statements along the lines of Theyve lost their only son which is an unfair statement that reeks of gender bias. (2008). Your sister was a beautiful person. Since it is such a singular honor, one shouldn't refuse an invitation to be a pallbearer except for illness or absence from the location in which the funeral is being held. Although their intent might be good, it doesnt always work that way. Simple condolences are universally acceptable. The funeral home will have chairs for the family graveside on the day of the funeral. A kind friend never leaves our hearts; they will remain with us always. 10 () . After this cremation ceremony, a reception at the familys place may happen. Keep your friend informed and get her feedback. Likewise, the person who passes an ugly remark at a solemn family function might not even realise what he said or did was hurtful. Decide upon the best way to get the word out to friends and relatives about the service.