Later he told the Master he was just
"Yes" he replied, but you will need to take your clothes off. an approved monitor. May all who belong to our order, scrupulously adhere-to this virtues not only in their transactions with their brethren, but with all mankind. The difference between a Masonic ritualist and a middle eastern terrorist? May every
"I'm going to be almost on time!" You lot are so focused on your possessions that you don't notice anything else in your life." If it wasn't for the Masons I wouldn't be here." Could you please provide me with examples of the Toast to the Ladies, can you assist in preparing a toast to the immediate past master please, something beffitting a brother who has been in the chair for 2 years. The Angel was astounded at the requirements for this one. boss to be a prominent Mason he made sure to wear his square and compass
WM This L odge is open, in the Name of God and holy St. John, forbidding all cursing and swearing, whispering, and all prophane Discourse whatsoever, under no less Penalty than what the Majority shall think proper; not less than One Penny a Time, not more than Six -pence. J.W. May he long continue to execute the duties of his highly important office with honor to himself, as well as to the lodges over which he so worthily presides. No longer questioning anything, the man went into the bathroom. On the appointed day a scaffold had been erected outside
"I wish that at our next Stated Meeting all the old PMs would just get along and not cause any trouble, not have to tell us how they did it their year, not complain about the ritual, not put down the current officers just sit on the sidelines and behave!" had time to exchange pleasantries and found that he too was a
you, Judge, are a Mason. increase of perpetual friendship and peace among the ancient craft. I've got to know." The Angel then noticed something and reached out and touched the womans cheek. square, plumb-line, and level, regulate the conduct of every brother. That being all he had to say, the Judge ordered the hangman to proceed. Two non Masons were passing a lodge after have quite a few drinks. Consequently, I offer the following lists of Masonic toasts which you might find useful. Come, fill up
MWB P.C.S. If you know anything about Maine, it's a long way from one major area to another, and travel can sometimes be tricky, especially in the winter months. Sheepishly, the man confessed that he had been sleeping on the beach the whole time. Fortunately, such occurrences are far and few in . He looked at the put carefull
When he got home the next morning, his wife was furious with him because he had
kicks. The Senior Warden is in charge of monitoring membership goals for the next year. Our mothers, sweethearts, wives;
If one appreciates this fact, then he must also understand that Harmony is a much more subtle and complex idea than the mere absence of dissent and conflict. free-mason be distinguished by the internal ornament of an upright heart. May we learn to be frugal, before we are obliged to be so. Awed by the regalia and apron of the Sovereign, the Tyler came into the Temple and said . Has to do with how quickly alcohol enters the bloodstream B. stuck","No", he said "to expensive", "what about the one with the MM apron
Ian Alexander
Chorus Solo frivolous distinction be buried in oblivion.
Every year the Grand Lodge . Just as he pulled the stereo out so he could disconnect the wires, clear as a bell he heard,
He was confused, "Then how did you get the rowboat?" The burglar relaxed.
When he reached the end he found a skeleton which had a sword in its hand. May the fragrance of a good report, like a sprig of acacia bloom over the head of every departed brother. And heavy with dull care, And now we're met upon the square May love and friendship jointly reign, May peace and harmony be our care, And ne'er be broke the adamantine chain. lodge; - 2 to check the type of lights the
party rage, and insolence, be for ever rooted out from among masons. Where was your spy hole? (GRANDLODGE) AvonGlen #170 G.R.A
Would you like to take a shower and shave? grandlodge: Grand Lodge of Canada in the Province of Ontario.
brother have a heart to feel, and a hand to give. our Most Worshipful Brother asked. Proposer: "Well they are the men who walk you around in the Lodge". ", A salesman walked into the post office in a small town and started
The junior Warden's Place in the Lodge?
pulled over, got his license and registration out and waited for the officer. COMMITTEES May every brother use the mallet in knocking off those superfluous passions that
"
"I have a still. Rivista di Massoneria - Revue de Franc-Maonnerie - Revista de Masonera - Revista de Maonaria . around his neck. The bird promptly answered, "Probably the same kind of people that would
His May the
Upon entering a Masonic Lodge, the first object which typically attracts one's attention is the altar, situated in the center of the room, midway between the East and West; directly opposite the South. 448, Lochee, Scotland replied, thank goodness for that, I was getting sick of Beaujolais!, A woman gets on a bus with her baby. So Brethren, I raise a toast to Caliburn Lodge, and to Peace, Love and Harmony. temple. For whatever reason, this is what William Shakespeare wrote: Petruccio speaks: Mouse traps. As with all of my Masonic articles herein, please feel free to reuse them in Masonic publications or re-post them on Masonic web sites (except Florida).
Boy! All free-born
Masonic Charges. 6014, it was the vision of your Grand Lodge Committee on Masonic Education to update this I told you that you were trying to put too much into this one., Thats not a leak, the Lord objected, thats a tear!, The Lord said, The tear is her way of expressing her joy, her sorrow, her pain, her disappointment, loneliness, grief, and pride..
A short time later there came across a large hole in the cloud and
Looking closer he saw 2 skeletons who would have been the secretary and the treasurer. To all
", Sent by :
Junior Warden, inquire who wants admission. Being a mason he realized that the skeletons were positioned as a Masonic Lodge. The Post Master told him that he was a Mason, as was the man
Finally he said, "All the mice are gone."
Does anyone have any advice on how a lady is to respond when there are no ladies left to share their words to the next generation of a Worshipful Masters wife?
free-born sons of the ancient and honourable craft.
Proposer: "Oh those - Well they are the ones who when they see the Walkers and the Talkers say Ohhh My Goddd!!!!! "Indeed I am," was the reply. The Toast to theVisitors., Tonight I have the pleasure
meant to the fellow, the Doctor asked the staff if there were any
" I have always fanced a Multi-Story-Carp-Ark said God". The term Warden is derived from the Ronald M Goldwyn, Worshipful J de la Verriere at 212 832 3799 in new york City. Suddenly there were the lights of another police vehicle visible in his mirror. For many Grand jurisdictions, it marks the end of the Masonic Year, and the birth of a new one. Our candidate, now feeling
to which the brother answered "pass". God bless the meat and God bless the stovies, We wish it could last for hours I was very worried when the mist covered the mountain, he said. Then drink to the Ladies! including the inner workings,and will always promp you when you get
Addeddate 2014-04-13 19:44:27 Identifier Small_Collection_Of_Masonic_Visitors_Toasts Identifier-ark ark:/13960/t3gx6xd41 Ocr ABBYY FineReader 9.0 Pages . Well we looked at each other and since we had time before our scheduled meeting, we decided to investigate? His candidate, though, was a very enthusiastic young man. Realizing how much this
To all ancient
And with that, she laughed a hearty laugh and passed away, a grin still on her face. He was making great time until he passed Freeport. The building manager took all this advice under consideration and it was agreed that at the next meeting he would make a report on his progress.
Warden being a more expert workman looked at it seccond, and said " That is
The great Masonic virtues faith, hope and charity.
"Well", our fellow said, "he might be experienced, but all he's doing is sitting there and barking! A woman brings joy and hope. You wont always agree with him, but Tim will definitely get you thinking. within the Masonic lodge hierarchy and helps the lodge to run smoothly, both May the rays of celestial light dart from the east. brother the king, and the royal and ancient
The
[ What is Freemasonry] [ Leadership Development] [ Education] [ Masonic Talks] [ Masonic Magazines Online] May our
The heart that conceals, and the tongue that never reveals. brother learn to live within the compass, and watch upon the square. "You're the Senior Deacon", name: Flotus
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Toast to Visitors . harmony, and concord, subsist among free-masons, and may every idle dispute and
The Masonic Lodge Junior Warden is the third highest ranking official in the Masonic Lodge. GLNY & GLCT, From Australia, the toast is in the form of a poem called. a Mason, as were most of the possee.
to give. answers unspoken questions about the facts and myths surrounding Freemasonry.
To each
Well the Senior
Redfern. ", Sent by :
Whenever, wherever they roam. The
and for Lodge Ibis (the Ibis is a medium sized water bird): She will go to the doctor with a frightened friend.
Weeks went by and Bill was tending his garden when he heard a familiar voice, "Bill"."Bill",
Have a nice day (substitute any officer you wish). I asked the lodge organist for a simple Masonic song that they would all know, rewrote the words, and sang it, getting them to join in with the chorus. Conflict is constructive when individuals ask interesting questions that provoke new lines of discovery, work to understand each others positions, and always remain open to new ideas. society instituted for the promotion of
"This one for example is called SW and he's a bit more experienced. May all Masons strictly adhere to truth; wisdom, virtue, and happiness will be the concomitants of such conduct. Unfortunately, while the brethren were on the mountain they were enveloped by a dense fog, cutting visibility to a few metres. #10", "why so cheap, he must know all the ritual and the inner workings?" The tyler being somewhat slow to answer for the visiting brother, the visitor states; My name is John Smith, PM of my lodge, Past Distric Deputy of my district, Past Grand Master of my Grand Lodge, Past Soverign Grand Commander of the Scottish Rite, York Rite Legion of Honor, Past Imperial Potentate of the Shrine of North America, who humbly requests an audience with the WM. . air balloon when suddenly a thick cloud formed between them
Mouse traps.
Hey peolple, any day above ground is a holiday but to mark these days is a good thing because some of our sisters and brothers are not here lets not forget were we have been and were we our today be bless people. "If someone does'n promp the Worshipful Master soon we'll be here all night. At best, this leads to superficial congeniality where folks are pleasant on the surface, but harbor distrust underneath. One
arrange all meals for the lodge, and, typically, the 2 Stewards act as his ", Sent by :
To all ancient Masons, wherever dispersed and oppressed. exclaimed " I have my own problems here to take care of, I have 5
undeterred the question master continued by enquiring, who was the first Grand Master Mason of Scotland? To which the poor old JD said under his breath (or so he thought)"And thank God for that", when he heard the Candidate say in a loud and clear voice: "And thank God for that. Board of General Purposes; - 3 to do a study on light in the
The heart that conceals, and the tongue which never reveals. is the one with the masters apron on", "#2000 and he knows all the ritual
Golden eggs to
? " Can you? May every free-mason have health, peace, and plenty. "Is that you Pat"? May we never feel want, nor never want feeling. (GRANDLODGE) Lodge Harold Herman Unity, NSW Australia
later in the masonic year, on evenings when no special work is schedualed.
May they always be desirous of contributing to the relief of their distressed Brethren and ever be destitute of the means. clicks. A Mason is not necessarily a member of a lodge. "Will you make me a mason" she asks Rabbie. May every Mason endeavor to attain a thorough knowledge of himself.
"On the south side of the island, there is a very unusual stratum of exposed alluvial rock. I understand that this poem is quite old and comes from England. courtesy of Bro. faction, and strife, be for ever rooted from every lodge. Do you believe that Freemasonry should be fun? And darn it, she was right, but how did she know? And solace in his strife, May the conduct of every Mason be such through life, that his Brethren may hear him when be makes his demand, see and recognize him at a distance, and by the strongest ties feel him and know him in the dark. "Brethren, today's work in the temple put me in mind of the first time I ever met Brother Fred. And blessd with wealth untold
You have no idea what she can endure or accomplish.. Yet, at the same time, one has to admit that one reaches an impasse here: should Sraffa's declaration of intention be other.
(E-MAIL) dblue@v-wave.com, The Master of the lodge and his two wardens went golfing one day. And drive out grief and tears; Australia, Toast to Grand Lodge But the fact that he was accepted in (Name) Lodge is proof enough, and anything that I might add would only embarrass him, and thats certainly not my intention.
"And it was a pleasure to meet you, MWB P.C.S..", Once again, MWB P.C.S. Province Name.
"I made it out of raw material that I found on the island. which haunt the heart of the covetous. At our Festive Board on October 5, 2006.
May our wisdom he as conspicuous to our sisters, as the wisdom of our grand master Solomon was to the queen of Sheba. Make happiness their portion, Lodge Leeton-Yanco 313, UGL NSW & ACT Virginia. GRANDLODGE = Rutherglen No 116, GL of Scotland
Isnt this a more apt understanding of what we, as Masons, mean by Harmony? May the
"It's not coconut juice," the woman replied. The study of the interplay between speech and pausing for breathing has been a . Every worthy
When we met for the first time, Brother (Name)s last name brought immediately to my mind the hero of Shakespeares Taming of the Shrew, Petruchio, the gentleman from Verona who came to marry well in Padua. Of course not! brother who was at first duly prepared, and whose heart still retains an awful
she would be eternally gratefull. was not known for his maintaining the posted speed limit. Yes, we may from time to time disagree with one another, but we are still brothers, and at the end of the day, as long as we continue to respect and trust each other, mere disagreements can never stand in the way of true brotherhood and friendship.
Palm Harbor, Florida, USA Thanks to all of the Brothers for their contributions. Whose lady is a treasure,
One young Senior Deacon
to read out correspondence, he read a letter from the wife asking if the brother where
Thank you brothers for the tools and mental stimulation to assist in my duty to toast the ladies. Finally he
He performs the following functions: Assistant officer: The Junior Warden is an elected officer in the Lodge. "Oh, simple," replied the woman. (E-MAIL) jonescook@home.com, At the monthly Building Socirety meeting much discussion raged about
lodge: St. John Slamannan No. She knows that a hug and a kiss can heal a broken heart. me guilty and said I should be hanged were Masons, so I hate Masons!"
In fact, if you looked up "lead foot" in the dictionary, chances are you might find a picture of our most esteemed brother next to the definition. lodge: Thistle Lodge No.96
freedom. After an hour or so (with the candidate dropping numerous Masonic
GRANDLODGE = Converse Lodge - Malden MA
Did she have a way of sneaking in the Lodge and spying on us? It was the night Fraser was going to be initiated, his good wife of many years said, "I'll be up when ya get home, so you can tell me all about it then."
The Doctor
The Angel was impressed. She smiles when she wants to scream.
balloon." mason's conduct be enabled to act so as to have
the job, what package would he expect. "Don't you know that's impossible? A woman can sing when she wants to cry. ", name: Peter Taylor
", the other asked. The fellow informed the Doctor that "I will only allow myself
" All those masters-in-office have to do is click their fingers and you
Its basic meaning The woman we love, and the friend we dare trust.
of Vitruvius, Angelo, Wren, and. asked the trooper if he was a Traveling Man. How many of you are there? confides. The bride swears to it all..
We are now approaching the holiday season where we typically enjoy several year-end parties. With loving care support them, You will have to make another wish." May all the
But all good things must come to an end Several
(#5 is to the Lodge) (***). grandlodge: Grand Lodge of Ireland, The Worshipful Master directed that the Lodge Deacons wear less aftershave in future, as the Candidate who had just been initiated that evening, when asked if he had felt comfortable during the ceremony,replied,"I was a bit worried for the first five or ten minutes, but the woman behind me was very helpful in keeping me from staggering! E-MAIL = k.rowell@ntlworld.com, two candidates were elected to enter on the same lodge night, one was a butcher and the other a sales rep.
Religion! worthy brother. Chorus Solo The SW, concerned that they could become separated in the mist, produced the rope from his backpack and instructed everyone to tie themselves to it. My Masonic principles absolutely prohibit me from misbehaving with the daughter of a Mason." You know we like to see you free-masons. gawk. From the lady whom he worships, He was told that
The Mason shoved her out of his bed saying, "I am a Mason.
GRANDLODGE = Alberton Lodge, no. asked how many other brethren had been there and all the regular questions that
grandlodge: Grand Lodge of Ontario, Canada. What do you think goes on in there? Two shells honed to a hollow-ground edge were fastened to its tip, inside a swivel mechanism. All the Jokes are posted by Brethren. May universal benevolence be the plumb line of all our actions. A recently raised Master Mason applied for a job and knowing his prospective
Fraser starts in a low whisper about the evenings goings on. "then there came a point in time during the meeting of the Lodge, they told me there's two doors. enter the first, and remove all your clothes turn out the light, and open the second door.. close it smartly behind you, it'll be dark there in that second room, feel for the switch beside the door and turn that rooms light on.
her husband had stayed the night after the last lodge meeting would please write to
May every Mason, who Is desirous of assisting a distressed Brother or his family, be always possessed of the means. brethren of our glorious craft be ever distinguished in the world by their
There is this Guy out at sea in a small boat, rough weather and it overturns, as he's bobbing about a life boat appears, as they called out, he said its ok I am a Royal Ark Mariner God will look after me, and refused thier help, after a short while a helicopter is overhead lowering a rope and again the guy says its ok I am a Royal Ark Mariner God will look after me,the guy refuses their help. ADD your Joke, A mason who had just been installed as Master of his lodge and was duly
A Mason was having trouble with his ritual, and was telling a fellow mason in
I do not see why a Fellow . GRANDLODGE = Lincoln Lodge #34, Grand Lodge of the Ph
very calmly and with just the hint of a grin on his face and replied.
identified himself, and pleaded his case. on the night of initiation the butcher went in first,when it came to the charge at the north east corner it was discovered that he had a quarter pound of liver in his pocket that he was going to deliver on his way home, obviously this had to be taken away. used to have speaking engagements all around the state. cried?
Full text of "Small Collection Of Masonic Visitors Toasts" See other formats A small collection of Visitor's Toasts From various sources It is a pleasure for me to have this opportunity to propose a toast to our visiting brethren. NAME = Siddharth Dhawan
Proposer: "Well there are are WALKERS, TALKERS AND HOLY MEN"
Well then, the Junior Warden look at
(GRANDLODGE) Grand Lodge F&AM of Ohio
never conquer a free-mason's virtue. Toast to Queen and the Craft Leverage your professional network, and get hired. She gives compassion and ideals, moral support to family and friends. live within the compass and square. May the Royal arch cover every honest masons heart, and overshadow all who act up to the true principles of the craft. May the single be married, and the married be happy. mouse poison.
I dont know. May temptation
continuing on the questioner further enquired, who is the current Grand Master Mason of Scotland?
want to tell the joke to which the salesman replied, "Not if I have
And return again someday, And now I ask the members to stand Brethren, a toast to our Brother (Name)! "Well, the sheriff who pursued me is
Now in the company of five Freemasons did the man still
; yes twenty decks said God; OK said Noah and do you want it filing with animals like last time; no said God, I want it filling full of fish; Fish said Noah! Like all other officers of the Masonic With his loved one by his side. The Junior Warden is also in charge of the unpleasant duty of filing Masonic charges against a fellow Mason (whether or not that Mason is a member of the Lodge or even within the same Grand Lodge jurisdiction). "I
156 free-masons live in love, and die in peace. there was a Jewish Doctor that worked on the 8th floor. Master!, The Junior Warden said, Halve it,
This is too much work for one day. . lodge: Mannford #515
Rabbie promptly asked her if he would join him overnight for some kissing and cuddling.
A Blue Lodge is a lodge of Freemasons that confers the first three ceremonial degrees: 1 Entered Apprentice. cares be unknown to free-masons.
May every
When he arrived at the interview he approached his interviewer in
A proper
She has to be completely washable, but not plastic, have 200 movable parts, all replaceable, run on black coffee and leftovers, have a lap that can hold three children at one time, have a kiss that can cure anything from a scraped knee to a broken heart, and have six pairs of hands.. "Yes" came his reply, "I hate Masons!" No matter how the SD explains that they have to proceed and let go his fist, the candidate never opened his fist until the WM asked for a recess and talked to the candidate. Who did the TEMPLE thus adorn She may cry when shes happy and laugh when shes nervous. Heres health and happiness to all. The Ladies!
The victim says: "I really can't understand this! name: Andrew Alexander
The heart of a woman is what makes the world spin! Now MWB P.C.S. She goes without so her family can have. got his tongue wrapped around his eye teeth awkwardly during the closing of
May we strive to resemble our divine Master, in promoting as far possible the happiness of all mankind and when we cannot succeed, may it be for want of ability, never for want of inclinations. In the unlikely event that a Masonic Trial becomes necessary, the Junior Warden is responsible for the conduct of same. When he heard nothing more after a bit, he shook his
(NAME) Richard Saxby Jr.
Knowing the festive atmosphere of such occasions I posted a request on the Internet soliciting favorite Masonic toasts. Oh, he recites the Working tools of the First Degree., was the reply.
Bedford Lodge 638, A.F.& A.M., GRC Come back to the lodge with me and Ill see you get a meal! No, thanks, said the man. references)the prospective boss asked if he were to be offered
headed north and as soon as he felt comfortable that he was way past the trooper, he pressed the pedal to the metal. May the Bible rule and guide us through life; the square, square our actions, and the compasses circumscribe the bounds which we are to keep with all mankind, especially with a Brother.
Indeed, our fellow returned the dog two weeks later. 's robing room , shouting, W.M., there is a case of Syphilis in the Lodge.The W.M.
upon the level, may we part upon the square.
Grace And what about that outstanding purple bird with the iridescent green plumage, I asked. They didn't meet during July and August because it was too hot and there was too much farming or timbering to be done. He always made himself the object of the story MWB P.C.S. practising for annual inspection, Sent by :
Let nothing come amiss; So my wish is for you to build a bridge so I can drive to Hawaii." we hail the morn! grandlodge: Grand Lodge of Oklahoma. virtue flourish.
May every
have it inscribed. it went down well. One night a gentleman walked into the hotel and noticed the Tyler standing outside the door of the banquet hall with a drawn sword in his hand.
let his foot do the talking, so to speak. pulled a curtain across and there were 3 parrots, one with a mm apron on, one
apron heart and hands.
GRANDLODGE = Youngstown Lodge#615 - G. L. of Ohio
She says to the Freemason next to her: The driver just insulted me! The man says: You go right up there and tell him off go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you., name: Rt.Wor.Bro.Andrew W.Coid. Let us toast
No, thanks! said the tramp, Ive never smoked and I never will! Okay, said the Mason.
kings, princes, and potentates, who propagate or protect the royal art. As I will be becoming JW this year in my lodge I will obviously be proposing the toast to the visitors.
Cincinnati, OH, USA who hunted me down was a Mason, the Prosecutor who tried my case was a
Why are issuing me a ticket? ", Sent by :
Of course several sugestions
the left arm and said,"Take one advancing step with your left foot. ritual. SEQUENCE OF TOASTS IN The Netherlands (Europe) And again, as soon as he was sure it was OK, MWB P.C.S. May we never meet an old friend with a new face. And glad that your always there.
ASSISTANT OFFICER: In How did you get here?" As the man looked onto shore, he nearly fell out of the boat. The man started to berate and criticize the Craft.
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